“What does it matter to you, Sangbin? Maybe there was nowhere he wanted to go.”
“Right. These days, everyone’s in an uproar about preparing for civil service exams even after graduating university. It’s wiser to just prepare without going.”
“Giyun, if you get appointed at your age, you could even reach the rank of Secretary by retirement.”
As the silence stretched, I could see people one by one scolding Sangbin and trying to smooth over the topic.
My mouth went dry at the thought that the atmosphere had turned sour because of me.
It was something that happened because I had become intimidated on my own. I should have moved past it wittily, but I couldn’t.
Is it because I lack quick wits…? I didn’t even know what kind of response would be considered witty in this situation.
The topic moved on elsewhere as if flowing with water. Around the time no one in the room was paying attention to me, Sangbin quietly tossed words to me that were neither an apology nor an explanation.
“I just asked because I was curious. You’re not offended, right?”
“No… I’m not.”
I thought so, too.
Sangbin probably didn’t say it with any ill intent toward me. I was simply a person to whom he felt he could throw any question.
He must have been checking my reaction, because when I nodded obediently, Sangbin’s expression noticeably relaxed.
“Right. It’s because you think so starkly.”
Leaving behind advice as if teaching me, Sangbin soon turned his head to join another conversation.
Stark. My life is stark, so my thoughts become stark, and I suppose that’s obvious to others. At the thought that I possessed a kind of shame I couldn’t hide, I felt embarrassed all over again.
Instead of giving a belated answer to Sangbin, who no longer had any interest in me anyway, that I had actually wanted to go to university, I swallowed the gall wine placed in front of me in one gulp. It was much more bitter than soju.
Though I didn’t clearly realize it, I, who had been careful not to get drunk until then, began to accept and drink the alcohol others gave me as it came. I was in the middle of getting quite drunk without even realizing I was becoming so.
“When did the CEO say he’s coming? The restaurant is going to close at this rate.”
Manager Kim, who ordered more soju saying this was really the last one, grumbled. When Seungjo was mentioned, I reflexively asked back.
“The CEO?”
“Yeah. We ask him every time we have a group dinner. He refuses most of the time even when we ask him to come, but he said he’d come this time.”
“……”
“Surely he’s not skipping out this time too?”
Upon hearing that Seungjo was coming, I immediately became anxious.
To calm my trembling heart, I poured more alcohol into my already intoxicated brain. My thoughts became even cloudier.
I scanned the empty plates that had been wiped clean in front of me.
I felt like I was going to burst for the first time in a while because of how much I had eaten and drunk. It felt like I had done my best in my own way to extort him.
Just as I was thinking about leaving since I couldn’t do any more…
“Hello.”
The familiar low voice stopped my thought circuits. I knew he had arrived just by looking at the long legs entering through the open door.
“You’re here, CEO?”
Despite Seungjo’s dissuasion, the employees all stood up to greet him. I followed suit, awkwardly half-rising before sitting back down.
“CEO, what took you so long? we were all just about to go home.”
“I’m sorry. Work finished late.”
“We ate all the eel.”
“Good job. Order more if it’s not enough.”
“Really? Then can we order Western liquor?”
“Go ahead.”
Answering the employees’ complaints skillfully, Seungjo sat in the empty seat of honor. It was the seat furthest away from me.
I stared blankly at him as he gracefully declined the drinks offered by those around him.
When our eyes met, I hurriedly looked down.
“Giyun’s glass is empty too?”
Fortunately, Manager Kim spoke to me just in time. As I tried to politely accept the offered glass with both hands, Seungjo called Manager Kim in a low voice.
“Manager Kim Sohee.”
“Yes?”
“Don’t make Eun Giyun drink.”
Manager Kim, suddenly called by name, blinked at the unexpected advice.
I was equally flustered.
Seungjo added an explanation with a smooth smile.
“It’ll be trouble if he gets drunk.”
“Really? How unexpected. Giyun, are you the type who turns into a dog when you’re drunk?”
“He’s more like a cat.”
Even Manager Kim, who for some reason was showing interest with sparkling eyes, was burdensome. Seungjo went one step further.
“He has a habit of jumping from high places.”
“…”
“As if he thinks he has nine lives.”
My face turned red for a reason other than the alcohol. To think that story would come out here.
The time he held me and saved me on the rooftop, the time I confessed my shame and sobbed like a child in front of him.
The surreal experiences were as vivid as if they had happened yesterday.
The reason they were so clear was because I habitually revisited the memories and tried not to let them go, but having that day’s events forcibly recalled in a boisterous gathering made me feel suddenly exposed.
Besides, jumping… There was clearly a misunderstanding about that, so I even felt a little wronged.
I had done nothing right, so I had no excuse even with ten mouths, but still….
“High places? Did you get hurt anywhere?”
“No, it’s nothing.”
When I shook my head immediately, Manager Kim tilted her head.
Seungjo was the same, saying nothing more.
It seemed he enjoyed watching me be flustered, even though he had no intention of talking further.
That relaxed posture of his was spiteful.
He always makes my moods and emotions fluctuate like that. He doesn’t care about my reaction in the slightest; I’m the only one who is conscious and falling apart.
As I expected, I should bring Choco Pies from the pantry next time too.
I made a vow in my heart as I stuffed the additional eel that had come out into my mouth.
It was strange that more went in even though I was full. Does spite improve digestion?
Thirsty, I reached for some water, but instead of the water cup, I stared intently at the empty glass in front of me. Then, I poured myself a drink.
No one was watching me. Except for Seungjo.
If I had noticed that Seungjo’s expression stiffened every time I gulped down a drink after that, the alcohol I was drinking would have tasted much sweeter.
Having eaten and drunk enough to be sick of it for several hours, and thanks to Seungjo, who had arrived late and actively wrapped things up, the company dinner ended before long.
“Anyone want to go for a second round?”
“I’ll head out now. Have a good weekend and see you next week.”
“Giyun, where do you live?”
“Incheon.”
“Hmm, no one lives in Incheon. Can you make it back alone?”
“Of course. See you next week.”
I greeted the employees who were disappearing one by one in front of the restaurant.
Around the time I thought I should leave as well, someone stood beside me. It was Seungjo.
The tip of the cigarette held between his two fingers glowed red every time he inhaled.
I watched the hazy cigarette smoke scatter as if entranced. Exhaling a long breath of smoke, he looked me up and down with a slight frown.
I thought he had left first, but I guess not.
Come to think of it, I felt like I heard someone say the CEO told them to go first.
A large sedan stopped in front of me as I blankly received his gaze.
The valet driver who got out of the car politely opened the passenger door.
Seungjo extinguished his cigarette and handed the valet fee to the employee.
“What are you doing not getting in?”
Seungjo tossed the words out as he headed toward the driver’s seat.
Is he talking to me? I looked around, but there was no one else.
Surely he wasn’t talking to the valet.
Half in doubt, I climbed into the passenger seat. I was slow to move because I was hesitant and cautious, but he waited patiently.
Seeing that he said nothing even though I had entered his private space, it seemed he had indeed been referring to me. The questioning doubt followed belatedly.
“Why am I… in here…?”
“I’m taking you home.”
“But why…?”
“Who told you to drink until you lost your mind?”
The clear irritation in his voice made Giyun shrink back.
“I told you I detest being the subject of gossip.”
“……”
“You just had a dinner with the staff; if Eun Giyun jumps off something or goes missing again, it’ll be a disaster for the office.”
Giyun stared blankly with his mouth open. Whether it was because his brain had fried from the alcohol, he still couldn’t wrap his head around it.
Did that actually justify him driving him home personally?
He was probably the one who was fried. After all, this man only ever spoke in terms of reason and logic.
Giyun fastened his seatbelt without another word. Regardless, there would likely never be another chance to be in a car alone with him.
Although it was only happening because he was drunk, it was a pity. Even in his inebriated state, that he wouldn’t be able to properly savor or reminisce about this moment later.
The interior of the car was as dry and orderly as his personality. It was a stark contrast to the noisy chaos of Changgon’s car. Even the seatbelt, of course, was black.
“Thank you for the ride….”
Giyun bowed his head.
Losing his balance, his head leaned forward more than necessary. His head throbbed, perhaps from drinking too much. He felt like his stomach was turning, too.
Seungjo watched with a pathetic look in his eyes as Giyun touched his forehead and then covered his mouth.
“If you throw up in here, I will strip you naked and throw you out.”
Why did he have to mention stripping him? It made him feel strange. Giyun crossed his arms in an X-shape, defensively hugging his shoulders.
“Is there really a need to strip me?”
“I’ll need something to wipe it up with.”
It would have been nice if he had said, even just in words, that the person was more important than the car.
At the cold response, Giyun gave Seungjo a timid glare. Seungjo tilted his head arrogantly.
“You have a problem with that?”
“…Am I not allowed to?”
“If you have a problem, get out.”
Leave a Reply