At Andrew’s question, Kim Seunghun shrugged.
“Well, do you think my life only walked a flower path? You said it before, Andrew. A person’s emotions cannot be only wholly happy. But does it seem like there could be a wholly happy life?”
“But your appearance is……”
Seeing Kim Seunghun’s sad expression for the first time, Andrew seemed a little flustered and trailed off.
“Just now, I heard your life story, Andrew, so should I also try talking a bit about my story? Haha.”
At Kim Seunghun’s words, Andrew quietly nodded.
The reason wanting to become an actor.
At the words that the start of all of it was from being ostracized in high school, Andrew, as if surprised, had no words.
“And after becoming an actor, tried to forget it all. Those guys who bullied me, struggled to completely forget them all.”
“…”
“But this came back and grabbed my ankle. An actor is a job that ultimately eats and lives on image. But an actor got ostracized? It’s gossip that is too good for people’s mouths to chatter about.”
Andrew held his breath and looked at Kim Seunghun without saying anything.
Kim Seunghun, who always smiled brightly.
As if never even dreaming there would be such a wound in him, Andrew, when a side that could not be seen showed in his profile, made an apologetic expression and quietly raised his glass.
Clink.
“But now it’s all okay. Haha. Chanhyeon and the current agency CEO saved me.”
“The people who lit up the luck of your life?”
Kim Seunghun, at Andrew’s words, who believed deeply about “luck,” shrugged once and then spoke.
“Well, yes. Haha. Originally did volunteer work, but recently also go to schools for volunteer work. Fans also help a lot with volunteer work.”
Watching Kim Seunghun speak with a bright smile, Andrew asked carefully.
“But ostracism… will stay as a wound for life, right?”
“Huh? Probably yes…? Because it’s being rejected by a group at an age when sensitivity is in full swing.”
Andrew quietly held his breath. At that look, Kim Seunghun asked as if puzzled.
“Why, why?”
“…”
Andrew blankly looked at the glass and slowly chewed over Kim Seunghun’s words.
That Andrew took the role of Gollum.
That was a huge burden on his daughter Grace.
When it became a rumor at school that she was Andrew’s daughter, Grace did not want to go to school.
No, rather than not wanting to go, she panicked.
She disliked the morning and each time morning came, the appearance of the daughter who used to smile brightly could not be seen from some point.
The thought that the one who made that situation was Andrew himself…
At the thought that the fundamental cause of that lifelong wound was himself, Andrew closed his eyes.
“Suddenly empathizing with my past or something…?”
Kim Seunghun spoke playfully and then soon stopped speaking.
Seeing tears flowing on his cheek, Kim Seunghun, as if flustered, pulled out a few tissues.
“Here.”
“Thank you…”
Andrew carefully wiped away the tears that had been flowing.
At the tears that were so sudden, Kim Seunghun was flustered, but soon shook his head and said to Andrew.
“If you don’t want to talk, then don’t.”
“…”
When the appearance of Grace being ostracized at school because of himself came to mind, Andrew’s chest tore even more.
That the daughter, more precious than his own life, suffered because of himself.
That fact made him even sadder.
It was a story never told to anyone.
Andrew, thinking that if it is Kim Seunghun who experienced the same as daughter, perhaps could know what emotions the daughter had, said to him:
“In fact, because of me, my daughter also had the same experience as you.”
“What? Because of you, Andrew?”
“Yes. Because of me. Because of that damn Gollum! Gave a wound to my daughter’s life.”
“…”
Kim Seunghun nodded without words and listened closely to Andrew’s words.
“My daughter probably bragged that I advanced to Hollywood. And when it spread at school that it was Gollum, they started teasing, like kids do.”
“…”
“If such a past stays in the heart for life like you said, becoming a good father is wrong…”
When Andrew trailed off, Kim Seunghun spoke.
“Chanhyeon said this.”
“Huh?”
“That the victim has no wrong. Do you have any wrong, Andrew?”
“…”
Kim Seunghun, thinking of the words that became great strength to himself, said once more.
“You have no wrong, and your daughter also has no wrong. Then with what sin are you ashamed to see your daughter?”
“Because of me…”
“No.”
Kim Seunghun cut off Andrew’s words and spoke.
“That’s because of the guys who bullied your daughter. If you feel guilt toward your daughter for that, will you even be able to properly look at your daughter’s face?”
“…”
Andrew lost words for a moment at Kim Seunghun’s words.
Because of his own shame, was it not that he could not properly look at daughter’s face?
At the thought that perhaps he avoided daughter, the pain seemed to grow even more.
“So, how long has it been since you saw your daughter?”
“Now it seems like about a year…”
“Damn long time not to see her.”
“…”
At Kim Seunghun’s words, Andrew let out a deep sigh.
“When this movie is finished, go see your daughter first. Anyway, this movie will succeed no matter what. It will be sold to the UK too.”
“…”
Andrew, still seeming to have no strength, answered with a drooped down air.
At that appearance, Kim Seunghun frowned and said.
“Make it succeed like crazy and become a good dad. Well, succeeding does not automatically make a good dad, but still… at least you can become a better dad than now.”
“…”
Seeing Andrew looking at the floor without any words, Kim Seunghun’s heart became strangely stung for no reason.
That even a person who always seemed full of irritation had this kind of emotion too.
Rather, at the thought that being full of irritation was a kind of self-defense mechanism, Andrew looked pitiful instead.
“If you were going to struggle that much, should have just beaten up the guys who bullied your daughter. It would have been easier than beating up the lead actor, right?”
At Kim Seunghun’s words, Andrew let out a snort.
“Laughing when someone says hit someone. Seriously. Not like a kid.”
Only now, toward Andrew who was faintly smiling, Kim Seunghun raised his glass. Andrew also raised his glass, clinked, and drank down refreshingly.
“Kkeu… nice. This is the first time talking about something like this.”
“Now I became a proper real friend, right?”
“What friend.”
At Andrew’s answer, Kim Seunghun frowned playfully and spoke.
“Damn it, becoming your friend is damn hard. Now I’m not doing it. Don’t tell me to be friends. Now I’m going to refuse.”
“Haha.”
Andrew looked at Kim Seunghun and smiled brightly.
“Tomorrow, make one call to your daughter.”
“Huh?”
“International calls are damn expensive, but I’ll pay for that much.”
“Thank you. Thank you…”
At Andrew’s words, Kim Seunghun smiled.
“Now say it so it can be heard clearly.”
“…”
Only now could Andrew know.
That if the wall built harshly to endure the world collapses, the world will collapse.
Because thinking like that, he had to become a sharper person.
But that wall.
When it was collapsed by an one unexpected man.
The world did not collapse.
Rather, as light that could not enter because of the wall seeped into him.
A huge wave rippled in his heart.
The next night.
Andrew, as Kim Seunghun said, carefully called ex-wife Evelyn.
“Hello?”
“E-Evelyn?”
“Huh, Andrew. Where are you now? Not Korea? Are you?”
“Huh? Yeah… that’s right.”
Evelyn, as if surprised, spoke in a hurried voice.
“International calls are super expensive. Is something urgent? If you send by email…”
“No, it’s not that. I wanted to hear Grace’s voice. Is Grace there now?”
At Andrew’s words, Evelyn was silent for a moment.
“Hello?”
“Huh? Uh… she’s here now. Huh?”
Thunk.
“Grace! Mom is on a call right now!”
“It’s Dad! Dad!”
A daughter’s voice heard after almost a year.
At the daughter’s voice that had almost not changed, Andrew barely held back the sobbing that leaked out.
“Dad?”
“Uh, yeah… Grace. Have you been well?”
“Of course, I’ve been well. How busy were you! Not even one call to your daughter? Did you even deliberately avoid me or something?”
At Grace’s words, Andrew’s throat tightened.
Not that Grace avoided, but that Andrew avoided.
Perhaps because he came to know that clearly that it felt like a huge nail that had been driven into the body was sliding right out.
“Haha, why would Dad avoid you?”
“Is it luck this and luck that again that you avoided me, right?”
“It’s not that…”
“Do you still obsess over luck these days?”
At daughter’s words, Andrew snorted a laugh and spoke.
“That’s true. Still carrying the one daughter bought me, you know?”
“What?”
“That thing you said you bought at the street market… as my birthday present.”
At Andrew’s words, Grace laughed loudly.
“Dad, you still carry that?”
“Recently, I…”
In the moment about to talk about Kim Seunghun’s story, Grace cut him off.
“I made that to tease you, though? No way you still believe that a truly great astrologer made that…”
“Huh?”
“Right?”
A feeling like something suddenly struck the back of the head.
At the sudden shock, Andrew, blank with shock, only blinked and had no words at all.
“Dad? Dad? Huh? Did you hang up?”
“Uh, uh. No. Haha. Hey, who would believe that. I just said it as a joke.”
“Right? Whew, I thought Dad was totally stupid.”
“Ahem.”
At Andrew’s forced cough, Grace talked about what happened during the year.
With a very bright voice as if filled with only happy things, she told from the new friends she made to the story that she joined an acting club.
“I’m also going to be an actor like Dad.”
“Yes, Grace is pretty, so… it will go well. But maybe…”
Andrew, asking Grace carefully, worried that the luck that had been good until recently disappears because of Kim Seunghun, and that his bad luck might be having a bad effect on family.
“Recently, was there any time luck was bad?”
“Dad, those are all superstition. Do you really believe it?”
“…”
“I’m really very happy. Like talking to Dad today too. These days there hasn’t been a time I wasn’t happy.”
“Haha, I asked to tease daughter once.”
“It doesn’t seem like that. It seems like you asked seriously.”
At Grace’s words, Andrew started playful acting.
“Everything until just now was acting. To tease daughter once.”
“Haha. What is that?”
“When filming ends, I’ll go over there. Let’s eat something delicious.”
“Yeah. I like it a lot!”
A conversation after a year.
After sharing all the stories he was not able to share until now and hanging up, Andrew’s mind went blank for a moment.
Luck is superstition.
That was Grace’s words.
“Yes, luck is superstition.”
Blaming himself for not being able to enjoy happily even when there were good things.
Andrew looked at Kim Seunghun smiling from far away.
“Talking for a really long time. This almost makes me need to take Andrew’s appearance fee away.”
“Anyway, this movie will succeed. Well, that much.”
“Oh, suddenly what confidence is this? Seems like your daughter also shared confidence?”
At Kim Seunghun’s words, Andrew smiled brightly and answered.
“Going to break my life rule from now on.”
That bad luck does not surge because of Kim Seunghun and does not fail.
Because Grace’s words are the answer.
A few days later.
The day before the first filming.
At Seonghyeon production company, Junseong and I looked over the plans checked countless times and the problems that could occur.
“Checked the set?”
“Yeah. Noona Juri had the spaceship model done for sure. Even things like devices inside feel plausible.”
Junseong’s question and my answer.
Checking like that many times, we did our best so even small problems would not happen.
“Whew. Did you see the articles?”
At Junseong’s question, I nodded without words.
Money invested in MILM and also the investment money received from the KMD side.
That was an astronomical amount that anyone with interest in the Korean film world could not help but have interest in.
[Gyeong Chanhyeon. A different attempt again. A ‘space’ film?]
[The amount invested to use CG, beyond imagination. Even hired foreign experts!]
As soon as the production announcement event ended, articles pouring down from everywhere.
The content of those articles was mostly negative.
A sneering mixed with concern, in the body of the articles.
In our country too, the existence called “space” had, up to now, been a material only handled in children’s comedy films.
Protagonists who sometimes explained a background roughly finished with black blackout curtains as space.
As if reporters also thought that the space to be handled in would not be much different from that, it looked like speaking around the words that my film would fail.
“Need to give it to reporters who are making a fuss. Whatever it is, saying it will fail, saying this and that. It’s the fourth movie now, why are these articles still following you?”
“Originally, these pessimistic tone articles sell better. And a space background film in our country, no, even looking worldwide, there aren’t many, right? The ones that exist all failed. Well, I can understand them acting like that.”
“Your heart is wide. Even just with a production announcement event, pulling this much attention, there is no one but you.”
Junseong irritably tapped the desk with his finger.
“It means expectations are that big.”
“Eish. Worrying about others for no reason… Those reporter bastards. Someone might think only guys overflowing with love for humanity become reporters.”
“We can show by result. Like always.”
“Acting cool…”
Junseong, as if dumbfounded by my words, laughed.
“Seunghun hyung and Andrew. They’re okay, right?”
“Ah, you haven’t seen Andrew recently.”
Andrew had completely changed in just a few days.
Grumbling was still the same, but the personality that was needlessly aggressive had dulled quite a bit.
Like having gotten some kind of enlightenment, he started to blend in well with the staff, and also showed effort to learn even a little Korean.
“He plays really well with Seunghun hyung. They almost became best friends.”
“What? Best friends?”
“Yeah. Seunghun hyung again brought Andrew to MILM and has him there. With soccer talk, the two were bickering again. Andrew even got irritated, saying why does he know so much about another country’s soccer league. But those actions, no matter how you look, are actions close friends do.”
At my words, Junseong laughed as if dumbfounded.
“Well, that’s good anyway. Their relationship was kind of a problem too.”
“Yeah. We now only need to film properly.”
“Yeah. It’s the start. The biggest production budget film in Korea’s history. That a director and producer only four years since debut are taking it…”
Junseong, as if feelings were new, spoke with a smile at the corner of his mouth.
“Confident, right?”
“Overflowing with confidence.”
“Nice. This time it has to spill over. If it fails, I have to live as a KMD slave. You know, right? I’m going to run away.”
“Hey. PD. Why is there no affection…?”
At my words, Junseong smiled and held up the middle finger.
“What affection? In a world that runs on money, money is affection.”
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