I’m Taking the Protagonist’s First Love Chapter 14

The shadows visible on the ground below were still overlapping. As Riu hurried to put some distance between them, Matthew’s gaze followed. Deep green eyes, clear in their intensity, stared tenaciously at Riu.

“So what’s the reason you have to go home?”

“Ah, it’s that… I left my supplies behind.”

“If it’s that, you don’t need to go.”

“Huh?”

At Riu’s foolish-sounding question back, Matthew opened the lid of the canister. Comically, the tools visible inside had been prepared in pairs. Faced with materials prepared as if in anticipation of this situation, Riu was at a loss for words.

“Then where shall we sit and draw now?”

“…”

“Why aren’t you saying anything? If you’re not really into it, shall we just go back home?”

It wasn’t “I’ll just go back,” but “shall we go back,” which meant he was suggesting they go together.

Flustered, Riu hurriedly waved both hands and moved toward where Rene was. As if he had been waiting, Rene made space. At the same time, Riu met Albert’s eyes and blinked a couple of times.

It was a signal to sit together, but his view was immediately blocked.

“Looks like dust got in your eye.”

“Huh? Ah, no, that’s not it……”

“Hold still for a moment, I’ll blow it out.”

Before he could say anything, Matthew’s hand touched over Riu’s eye. Matthew carefully blew air around the slightly parted corner of his eye. In the subtly awkward situation that had been unintentionally staged, Riu’s heart grew anxious.

He kept picturing Rene watching from behind. As anxiety made Riu bite his lip, Matthew quietly asked,

“Why?”

The voice rang flat, yet it carried a faintly stinging edge. An ominous thought came to him that maybe Matthew knew about this situation.

Thinking surely it was just needless worry, Riu shook his head and sat down beside Rene.

Matthew also sat next to Riu and took out supplies from the canister for him. Riu silently accepted them and looked ahead once.

A breeze passed that felt a bit cozier than before. Since it hadn’t been long since it rained, the stream was a little more swollen than usual. Watching the water flow swiftly down, Riu curled his fingers inward. Seeing Matthew look as if he didn’t even intend to get closer to Rene, Riu gave up.

He knew that unless people grew close naturally, a bond forced together that way wouldn’t last long. If Rene truly wanted to get close to Matthew, there would be plenty of chances to seize.

Rene was that much a charming person who wouldn’t lose out to Matthew. Unlike insignificant him. Looking at Rene, who lacked nothing—family background, looks, personality—Riu unconsciously put strength into his fingertips.

“Ah…”

The snapped pencil lead flicked and bounced toward Rene’s spot. Riu bent his waist, picked up the lead, and dropped it on the ground. Somehow, he just couldn’t concentrate on drawing today.

“Sorry, but I’m going to head out first.”

“Why?”

Even with the gaze trailing him, Riu hurried to pack up. He didn’t forget to preempt things with words, in case Matthew might get up to follow.

“Sorry to duck out suddenly… I’m not feeling well. You two draw a little more and then go.”

With that as his last words, Riu quickly left the place. Walking fast as if someone might give chase from behind, he soon turned toward the forest. It was the shortest path that would get him home quickly.

His steps sped up in step with his growing impatience. At the moment, he was panting with breath rising, someone roughly yanked his wrist.

“Riu Carter.”

Suddenly forced to a stop, his body lurched, but he immediately found his balance. From between his parted lips, only ragged breaths still leaked out. He had thought he might follow, but he hadn’t expected he really would. Because Matthew’s behavior kept causing misunderstandings in front of Rene, Riu’s eyes welled up.

He wanted to live quietly, like always. He had no desire to fall out with Rene, nor did he want to try making things work with Matthew. He could just endure his heart; he could just suppress his desire.

But Matthew wouldn’t let him. He kept getting in his line of sight and on his nerves. Deliberately making it impossible to do this or that, Matthew made his feelings ambiguous.

“Let this go.”

At Riu’s slightly trembling voice, Matthew’s green eyes wavered. Matthew quietly released the hand he had been holding and pressed Riu toward a tree. He didn’t forget to pen him in with both arms, lest he try to run.

“Why are you so angry?”

“I’m not angry.”

Riu denied Matthew’s words. But in Riu’s curiously sharpened tone, the emotion showed through exactly as it was. Even with his small huffs, Riu’s chest moved rapidly. Watching Riu turn his head as if he didn’t want to talk anymore, Matthew let out a small sigh.

“Riu.”

Even when called, Riu’s lips remained stubbornly closed. Seeing Riu not spare him a single glance and only look down at the ground, Matthew clenched his fist. Blue veins bulged across the back of his hand in turn.

“……What on earth should I do with you.”

Letting out his pent-up frustration, Matthew roughly swept back his hair. A bit of irritation seeped from his fingertips. Seeing Riu, who wouldn’t even give him a chance to get angry when the person he ought to be angry at was someone else, Matthew grasped his chin. Meeting his gaze, there wasn’t a trace of a smile on Matthew’s face.

“Were you trying to tie me up with your friend?”

At Matthew’s words, Riu’s pupils trembled. As if he had struck the heart of it, cracks showed in Riu’s expression, and Matthew’s face hardened for a moment. With eyes cold enough to chill, Matthew wore a slight sneer at the corner of his mouth.

“Looks like you were. But what were you getting out of doing that?”

“…”

“There must have been something you were to get in return for helping. What were you supposed to receive? Your guaranteed future? If not that, a comfortable life? Which is it?”

Matthew’s voice, asking as if pressing him, felt chillingly terrifying. Even though he whispered gently as usual, Riu’s lips wouldn’t open easily. He only let out dry breaths, the corners of his eyes quivering.

Seeing Riu tremble like a deer frightened out of its wits, Matthew’s lips twisted coldly. Thinking that, at times, silence becomes an affirmative answer, Matthew let go of the chin he had been holding.

“If it was that, you should have told me. I can give you everything you want.”

“…”

“I told you I was looking for the person who took my first night. But I guess those words didn’t sound sincere to you. Right?”

At Matthew’s words, Riu shook his head. Seeing Riu deny vehemently, as if at least this really wasn’t it, Matthew let out a laugh of incredulity. Frightened by that laugh, Riu flinched before he knew it.

“If not that, then what? Say it with your own mouth—why you, among all the many people, tried to link me with someone else.”

“I’m sorry…”

“Suddenly?”

“I know you must have felt bad. But that doesn’t mean I ever ignored your true feelings. This is really true.”

He meant it. He had been flustered at the talk of finding that person, but he had never taken that feeling as a joke. He had only been afraid that he would find out that the person was himself.

As if to verify the truth, Matthew’s eyes fixed on Riu’s. At Riu’s sincerity, which appealed without wavering, Matthew’s hardened face softened a little.

The air that had been pressing down heavily, as if to oppress, had loosened before they knew it. A gentle breeze ruffled Matthew’s smoothly textured hair. Matthew’s green eyes were sunk deep, as if lost in thought. Riu stole a glance at Matthew, who still had him caged in and was sunk in thought.

Tense about what sharp words might come out of Matthew’s mouth next, Riu fidgeted with his fingertips.

“Today, you’re the one in the wrong, Riu. Right?”

“…”

Matthew, whose voice had somehow returned to softness, swept aside Riu’s bangs. Once, twice, slowly brushing upward, Matthew then rubbed along the line of Riu’s lips. Today, Matthew was looking down at Riu with a gaze different from usual. Overwhelmed by the creeping anxiety, Riu began to tremble a little.

“I’m in a very bad mood right now. I’d like you to ease my mood a bit—what do you think?”

“If it’s within what I can do, I will.”

Amid the mounting tension, Matthew smiled faintly. Seeing Matthew smile as if he had never gotten angry, Riu swallowed before he knew it.

Somehow, he felt as if he had stepped into a trap of his own making. Even as he tried to console himself… 

It’s just my imagination, it must be

Matthew’s eyes looked full of ulterior motives.

“There’s one thing I realized from this. It’s that I probably need to find that person quickly.”

“Ah.”

“And to do that, I really need your help. Fortunately, you said you’d help me. Right?”

With eyes brimming with self-interest, Matthew pressed him for an answer. At the look that seemed to say, You just have to give me the answer I want, Riu slowly nodded.

“If it’s something I can help with……”

His fingertips grew damp with anxiety. As if pausing, about to say something. Riu’s lips felt parched.

“Of course it’s a way you can help. Unlike before, we narrow it down through physical contact.”

“…Me?”

“Yeah—you and me, Riu.”


T/N: Honestly, the author is challenging my patience and my brain…

One response to “I’m Taking the Protagonist’s First Love Chapter 14”

  1. Same. The author is challenging my patience and brain as well. This seems like one of those story plots someone is supposed to be transmigrated into rather than a novel itself… so much so that it took me until I finished typing that sentence to remember that this was ALREADY a transmigration story. To be honest though, the plot would be kind of hilarious if it was a double transmigration. Imagine: someone gets transmigrated into Rene and the new Rene and Riu just keep trying to set Matthew up with the person whom they view as the “true love interest”. The thought of Riu and Rene passing Matthew back and forth like a hot potato or a tasteless, unwanted gift makes me giggle.

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